my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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