Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
