I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
