my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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