Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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