if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
