best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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