My balls are so social today.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
