my vag is so smooth its legendary
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
