He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
