Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize
