Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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