24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
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