These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
