I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
