As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
