Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
