Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
