She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Randomize
