I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
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