You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Randomize
