jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize
