P.S. I can't hear my feet
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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