Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
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