there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
