I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize
