covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
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