doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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