I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Definitely went to court without a bra and panties because Mr. LastNight’s dog stole them. I guarantee you I was the only lawyer going commando in court
Randomize
