I wish I could punch you in the face.
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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