You work out of a Hotel?
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
