If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
What a dumb baby whore.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
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