apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
Randomize
