No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Someone came in the potted fern
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize
