Small penises have feelings too.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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