Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
You were trust falling into bushes
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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