You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
it glows. i had to have it.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
