She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
I'm doing a half mile walk of shame carrying a trash bag and still very drunk. Save me. I feel like a refugee.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
