I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
