we have pet lesbian snakes
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize
