At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize