you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
