so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
My vagina is very pro this idea
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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