She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
