White coat. Heels.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
