I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
as your best friend, I hope we never outgrow 'I Just Got Laid' texts
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
