im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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