i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
