And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Randomize
