I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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